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How to De-Stress your wife for the Holidays…

It’s that time of year again… the time for peaceful snow flakes, cozy fires, and warm fuzzy feelings of Holiday cheer.

It’ also that time of year, when your beautiful understanding and loving wife turns into that evil chick from “Taming of the Shrew”.

Like most women, she is probably already overloaded with being a Wife, Mom, Daughter, Boss, Employee, Friend, Charity Chairperson, Household manager, and all round caregiver. Now, with the Holidays she is also expected to be a Cookie baker, Costume designer, Set Designer, Gift Expert, Party organizer and all round “get it done” person.

Suddenly her already crammed pack day of getting kids up and off to school with proper lunch in hand is now plumped out with last minute cookie baking and hours of shopping in overcrowded malls.

Who wouldn’t be stressed? Nobody has that kind of patience or stamina.

So… As a word of warning to the Husbands out there… Be prepared for two months of PMS.

Think of it as preparing for the big game or war…. You need to have your weapons ready and a good strategy.

• Be prepared to give lots of Hugs and Affection (Big hint… SEX is not the same as affection)
• Be prepared to not have Sex for awhile (see above… Remember SEX is not the same as affection)
• Become very familiar with your kids favorite Fast food restaurants (hint..YOU need to pick up the food not tell your wife to go..)
• Learn to load the dishwasher and operate a vacuum (hint … don’t expect her to fawn all over you for this)
• Put off the Poker nights with the guys until after the holidays
• We know Sports are important …Get TIVO and go to the stupid Holiday Play at the school.. If your wife can miss her favorite show for the kids, you can miss a game or two.
• Learn to bite your tongue… No matter what she says… Keep telling yourself “This too will pass”
• Line up a few Babysitters, learn the secrets of Calgon and bubble baths (hint.. SEX is not the same as affection)
• Remove these words from your vocabulary…. “It looks fine”, “I’ll do it later”, “not now”, “go ask your mother”, “I’ll ask my wife” and “It’s not my fault”.
• Remember …. You can survive this … if you are well prepared.

To all the wives reading this that want to know how to De-Stress your husbands for the Holidays….

• Sex
• More Sex
• Talk about Sex
• Remember Hugs and Affection are not the same as Sex