Welcome to Parenting Help Me, If you're new here be sure to click on the orange button in our sidebar to get the latest Parenting tips, you can also click the blue twitter button to follow us on twitter.

Children and Bullying

Children since the dawn of school education have been bullied by bigger and meaner children. Although it is a common place problem it does not mean that is acceptable for a child to bully another child. Children have it hard enough with tougher academic loads than in the past. Children tease each other and this can be hurtful. Bullying is a combination of a child being teased and being hurt by another youth. Bullying happens for a variety of reasons. Children can learn methods in how to deal with a bully.

When a child does not want to go to school and feigns illness one of the reasons may be a bully waiting for the child at school. Children are often reluctant to discuss when another child is picking on them as they are often threatened by the bully to not tell. The bully will hurt them more if they tell someone they are being hurt. Bullying is often not a one time occurrence. Often times a child will be teased and hurt repeatedly by a child that is bigger or even by a group that feels they are stronger than the youth they are picking on. Bullying can be anything from teasing, to physical violence, to sexual violence (including rape). Children can even be bullied at home when they are online chatting to friends a bully could instant message them with cruel words or threats of violence. Parenting requires the parent to spend time understanding why the child is uncomfortable with school or different activities.

A child may be bullied because they are disabled (physically or mentally) and other children think they are better than this child. A child could appear to be different than the other kids in terms of height, age, or other reasons related to how they could look and may be bullied due to their difference in appearance. Another reason could be because a child is considered to be unpopular or poor. Children tend to be cruel to anyone that looks or acts differently than what they are used to.

Children need to be taught from a young age that it is acceptable to discuss when they are being bullied. A lot of children are apprehensive to tell adults because they fear nothing will be done. I worked with a child at a mental health hospital that was constantly picked on for being overweight. When I met with him and his family he revealed he did not tell his family because he feared the school could not do anything to help him. When a youth feels this way it is important to remind children that most schools do not tolerate bullying and there will be consequences for the bully’s behavior. It is important to let the child know they are not in trouble or tattling when they share that a bully has been picking on them.

The first step is to talk with the parents of the child to let them know what their child is doing is not acceptable. The next step would be to let the school know and decide what consequences are best for the youth.